New Chuck Norris Facts | New Chuck Norris Jokes - Page 19

Chuck Norris fact / joke 5216 by Nuck Chorris on 2012-01-24

Chuck Norris keeps a shotgun in his wallet.

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Chuck Norris fact / joke 5215 by Nuck Chorris on 2012-01-24

Chuck Norris uses liquid nitrogen as mouthwash.

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Chuck Norris fact / joke 5214 by Nuck Chorris on 2012-01-24

Chuck Norris had a confirmed kill count of over 50 by his third birthday.

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Chuck Norris fact / joke 5213 by pHiLi on 2012-01-24

Chuck Norris was aboard the Costa Concordia. When it sank, Chuck Norris inflated his beard and swam away with 427 grateful passengers.

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Chuck Norris fact / joke 5212 by Nuck Chorris on 2012-01-24

The only question: Does Chuck Norris have to choke a bitch?

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Chuck Norris fact / joke 5211 by Nuck Chorris on 2012-01-24

Just before killing someone, Chuck Norris likes to say 'where's your god now?'

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Chuck Norris fact / joke 5210 by Nuck Chorris on 2012-01-24

At various times during the making of Star Wars movies, Chuck Norris was considered for the parts of Han Solo, Luke Skywalker, Darth Vader, the Emperor, Chewbacca, Lando and Yoda. In each case he would be wearing his regular clothes and speak in his Texan drawl.

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Chuck Norris fact / joke 5209 by Nuck Chorris on 2012-01-24

Chuck Norris choked Kim Jong-Il to death with some spicy cabbage.

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Chuck Norris fact / joke 5208 by Nuck Chorris on 2012-01-24

Chuck Norris is, in theory, banned from visiting Greenland as his body heat will melt the glaciers. I say 'in theory' because nobody can fucking ban Chuck Norris from anywhere. It's just lucky that Chuck don't give a shit about Greenland.

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Chuck Norris fact / joke 5207 by Nuck Chorris on 2012-01-24

The only way to get mercy from Chuck Norris is to say his name three times in Chuckenese. Mispronouncing will only make your fate worse.

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